By Nelson Manneh
“It is better to be divorced and a single mother than to remain in an antagonistic marriage,” says Mariatou Cham, a single mother of two, as she reflects on her decision to seek an annulment. Her story is one of courage, resilience, and the pursuit of happiness in the face of societal judgment.
From Dream to Disillusionment
Mariatou, a determined mother of two, voluntarily sought a divorce after five years of marriage. Initially filled with dreams of partnership and support, she discovered that her reality was far from the happiness she envisioned.
“After two years of marriage, my husband dramatically changed,” she said. “He became a lion in his own jungle, treating me like a subordinate and refusing to support my financial independence, even after I worked hard to earn a degree in business management at the University of The Gambia.”
Mariatou had aspirations of becoming an entrepreneur. Armed with a certificate from the Management Development Institute (MDI) and a degree from UTG, she envisioned her banker husband’s support in achieving her dreams. But the reality was starkly different.
The Struggles of a Businesswoman
Despite the lack of support, Mariatou embarked on her entrepreneurial journey, starting her business with little to her name. “I had no inheritance from my parents or husband, but hope and aspiration carried me forward. Today, I am financially stable and employ others,” she proudly stated.
Starting with over three employees on her payroll, Mariatou’s path was fraught with challenges. But her determination and support from her uncle propelled her forward. “He gave me financial assistance to expand my business and assured me of his moral support,” she recalled.
The Breaking Point
Mariatou’s marriage reached a breaking point when her dreams clashed with her husband’s expectations. “I confronted him about our earlier agreements regarding my career,” she said. “But he dismissed my concerns, leading me to a painful choice: let go of my business or my marriage.”
After numerous attempts to salvage the union, Mariatou made the difficult decision to leave. “It was not an easy ride,” she admitted. “I was left with only a few clothes, collected by my sister, and faced immense societal judgment.”
Societal Stigma and Emotional Struggles
Divorce is not just a legal process; it’s an emotional battle, especially in a society quick to judge. “People labeled me as someone who disrespected her husband or sought independence for selfish reasons,” Mariatou said. Despite the stigma, she chose not to seek financial support from her ex-husband, even for their children.
“Men approached me for marriage after my divorce, but I refused. I wanted to prove to myself and others that I was not a gold digger,” she said. Instead, she focused on her business, which flourished within two years, transforming her into a successful entrepreneur.
Life Lessons and New Beginnings
Reflecting on her journey, Mariatou shared her insights: “Divorce is a journey filled with emotional stress and financial battles, but there is joy at the end. I won’t encourage women to divorce lightly, but for those in antagonistic marriages, it might be the only path to happiness.”
Today, Mariatou is celebrated for her resilience. She is often invited as a guest speaker to share her inspiring story. “The society that once judged me now admires my strength and vision,” she said. While she initially vowed never to remarry, she now considers it as part of fulfilling her faith.
Mariatou’s journey is a testament to the power of resilience and self-belief. “I’ve come a long way,” she said. “If staying in a toxic marriage means losing your happiness, it is better to leave and rebuild your life. Today, I am a CEO and an employer. My story is proof that life after divorce can be fulfilling.”
